Tonari no Seki no Satou-San chapter 32

One more chapter and we are caught up to the manga. This continues from the last chapter

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Title: Satou-san’s confession

After a long period of crying, Sato-san began to speak in hushed tones.

“I knew it was coming.(S)

It was a muffled, wet voice. She continued to look down, still hugging me.

“I thought he wouldn’t come again this time. I thought he wouldn’t see me again. I wanted to believe it, but I couldn’t help but think so.”(S)

I listen to her as I support her shoulder.

“The last time I was here I was…. I’ve been waiting and waiting like this for a long time, but in the end he never came. Nope, maybe he was coming. Maybe he was coming, but when he saw me, he was disappointed. And then maybe he left, is what I thought.”(S)

I felt eyes on me from somewhere in the lobby, but I didn’t check or look at them.

“I thought it was a bit odd that he apologized to me much later in our previous meet up, but I thought it was weird that he had my phone number and email address and he didn’t even call me, but he acted like nothing happened, so I didn’t mind, either. But…I was worried about a lot of things.”(S)

Satou-san looked up. She looked terrible from crying so much. Her eyes were red and swollen and swollen, and there were still traces of tears on her cheeks. Even the tip of her nose was bright red.  Satou-san is not a particularly beautiful woman. But I couldn’t take my eyes off of her. The closest I could get to her after she cried was staring at her face.

“Yamaguchi was right. I was so insecure, I couldn’t believe it even if I tried, but I just couldn’t get away from him. I felt like he was the only person who could help me.”(S)

Satou-san smiled awkwardly, rubbing her eyes.

“I wonder if you remember…. The time I asked Yamaguchi-kun to help me with my book report.”(S)

“Yes.”(Y)

I nodded.

“Yamaguchi-kun said to me, ‘I don’t feel sorry for you, I sympathize with you’. I thought then that maybe he would come to feel that way about me.”(S)

“What do you mean…?”(Y)

I asked, and she said slowly.

“In the beginning.  At first, I got a text message from that guy by accident and we became friends. But I had just gotten a cell phone at the time and was a very slower texter than I am now. But I was so slow, and he was there for me, even though I was so slow.(S)

She speaks out as if she were reminiscing.

“He was so kind to me, even though I made all sorts of mistakes. He was too kind, even to the point of being sweet. I thought it was all because he was sympathetic to me, but when I heard Yamaguchi’s words, I thought maybe he was wrong. I thought that maybe you could get more than just sympathy from me.”

Silently, I tied my mouth shut. Maybe I said something unnecessary at the time.

“”I knew that because of this, if I fell in love with someone, that person would get in trouble. I knew that if they found out I was in love with a guy in my class, or a guy from the same school, they wouldn’t like me.”(S)

Satou-san, who has no sense of humor, says such things in front of me. She’s plain, fragile, unassuming, and unbeautiful. But she is cheerful and warm, and to me she is a very pretty girl. It’s impossible for me to dislike her. I’m not a fan of it, but I want it. –I’m not going to be able to get rid of it. Satou-san, who knew nothing about my thoughts, continued to say.

“I’ve been thinking that if I’m going to love someone, it should be someone so far away that I can’t even see his face. He was perfect for me. He was perfect for me because he was kind and distant, and he didn’t have to see my face. But now that I liked him, I was worried. I didn’t know him, and I didn’t know much about him, let alone his face. But once I realized that he was all I had left, I couldn’t leave him. I was still insecure and I fell in love with him, and in the end…”(S)

Wet lashes blinked.

“I guess I just forced myself on him, I guess. My feelings for him. Maybe he was just trying to fit in with me and asked me to meet him. He was such a sweet person.”

Then Satou-san smiled a little. Somewhat more naturally than before.

“I guess crying just blew me away a bit. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you look unseemly.”(S)

“No, you didn’t.”(Y)

I shook my head. I’m not afraid of anything when it comes to Sato-san. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have rushed to this place.

“Thank you.(S)

Satou-san said, looking truly relieved.

“No, I’m the one. I’m sorry I seemed to barge in on you without permission.”(Y)

In fact, I’m one step away from being a stalker. I’m glad I got here because I got here as a necessity, but what was I going to do if I could only be a distraction? It’s a meaningless imagination now.

“No. I’m really glad you’re here. I’m really glad you came. It’s all thanks to Yamaguchi-kun that I managed to calm down.”

Satou-san said, and then suddenly tilted her head slightly.

“You know, I think I’m going to have a look in the mirror. I look terrible, don’t I?”(S)

“Well, yeah.”(Y)

It was definitely a face after crying. Not too bad, I can’t say.

“Go ahead. I’ll be waiting for you.”(Y)

I said and sent a puzzled Satou-san off.

Satuo-san’s back was straight as she walked to the restroom. The crowded lobby swallowed her up as she faltered in the crowded lobby, but I knew I didn’t need to worry. She’ll be back. She’ll come back.

Now that I was alone, I looked at the clock. It was already past 7pm. It was completely dark outside, and it might be late by the time I took the train home. I was glad that I didn’t make her wait any longer. I was relieved. I finally calmed down and began to look around. The airport lobby was noisy and busy, and no one seemed to be paying attention to us in the corner. I was fine with that, too. If someone were to laugh at me or make fun of me, I would still like Satou-san and I would want to protect her. Even if no one cares about her, I will still be looking out for her. I will continue to look out for her, hopefully for a long time to come. The other thing that remains to be seen is whether or not I can convey this feeling to Satou-san herself – that’s the hardest part. Especially after something like this, it’s the hardest thing to do. But I’m no longer in a hurry, so maybe it’s best to take it easy and wait for the right moment.

Soon, Satou-san returned.

“Sorry to keep you waiting,”(S)

A slight blush receded on her face. She smiled as she stood in front of me with a bashful smile, still just enough to show that she was after crying, but looking somewhat calmer.

“I did not wait much,”(Y)

“Really? Thanks, Yamaguchi-kun.”(S)

Then Satou-san said in a voice that had returned to brightness.

“Yamaguchi-kun, I have a favor to ask you.”(S)

“What?”(Y)

I ask right back. I’m willing to do whatever Satou-san asks of me, but

“If you don’t have anything else to do, could you come with me on the way home”(S)

She said to herself that she was leaving.

“It’s fine.”(Y)

So I nodded. There was no objection. If Satou-san had wanted it, she had no use for this place anymore. There was no reason for her to stay.

“Let’s go home.”(S)

Satou-san smiles.

I couldn’t help but smile back at her as her single knotted hair swayed. I felt happy to be able to end a day of dizzying emotions with a smile.

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